Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Have you ever wondered?

Can you cry under water?

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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

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Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

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What disease did cured ham actually have?

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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

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Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural

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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

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If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME junk, why didn't he just buy dinner?

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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

15 comments:

FortuneCookie said...

Thanks for making me think! I was in kind of a funk, not knowing which end was up, lol.

Peace and hugs to you babygirl!

Ticharu said...

Your blog is always great Lee Ann! How do you come up with this stuff day after day??? You put the rest of us to shame!

BTExpress said...

ROTFLMAO!!!! I loved these. Thanks for the laughs!

jamwall said...

i think socrates asked these same questions.

Osbasso said...

Yes, I sang them both. Missing you, dammit!

onan the bavarian said...

That gave me some laughs, Lee Ann.

For some reason, my bloglines page is no longer updating when you do a new post, but it's still working for other blogs e.g. rablissblog. That's why I've been a bit slow coming to visit. I'll look into it.

Jason said...

All goods points. Have a good day.

Dave Morris said...

One thing I know, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and the Alphabet Song both make me cry underwater.

Kelly said...

Great questions! I like the imagery of crying underwater.

Crabby said...

I bet that ham had an STD. Pigs are real loose with their sexual favors. Not that I know personally.

pssst. It's me, Crabby. I'm looking for a new name so I won't be a seafood any more. So far all the suggestions over at the field involve hos and boobs. Since we're voting on what the folks suggest, I'm gettin' scairt.

DaMasta said...

Ha! Silly dogs! :o)

I feel ya on the luggage one but don't those damn wheels always come off? And don't you hate it when you're pulling a suit case and it keeps leaning to one side?

LOL thanks for the post!

JLee said...

Very thought provoking! :)

BeckEye said...

I don't know if I can cry underwater, but I'm sure I can scream. As much as I love being in water, I hate being totally submerged. It freaks me out.

Spinning Girl said...

These are so fantastic! I don't know how you come up with this stuff.

I think you can cry underwater. How else are you going to express your grief when your bathing suit top floats away at the beach?

Buffy said...

Twinkle Twinkle and the ABC song has the same tune?

Who knew...