Monday, September 26, 2005

Is it disrespectful?

Do you know what I have noticed? People are oblivious and in their own little world.
I went to the store today to buy just a few items. Eight items to be exact. I won’t bore you with the specific purchases I made. Anyhow, there were several cashiers open. I went to the “Express Lane” it specifically states on the sign “10 items or less”. There were two people in front of me. Guess how long it took me to go through this express lane? 15 minutes! To me, that is not very quick considering there should have been no more than 20 items checked out before me. Well, “should have been” are the key words. The first lady was nearly finished when I walked up. She had 4 bags full of things. Unless those “things” were all big things, then she must have had more than 10 items. There seemed to be some problem with the check out, but I was not sure at first. I was distracted by the lady customer talking on her cell phone.
Then she handed the phone to her daughter.
Did you know the person on the other end of the phone was the girl’s father, he was out of town and the little girl was wondering if he was coming home soon? They also had to pick up Kendell right after leaving the store and they had a game to go to which started at 2:15.
People and their cell phones…..they have absolutely no discretion.
There is no such thing as a private conversation any longer.
The cell phone has become such an important factor in their life; they will answer and talk to people anywhere and anytime.
I especially detest it when they start talking during check out in the store. The cashier is trying to ask them something in which they do not answer, or they completely lose track of where they are and what they are supposed to be doing, like paying!
They stand there carrying on a conversation for everyone and their brother to hear (which by the way, when they notice you are standing there listening, they look at you like you are eavesdropping….what are you supposed to do, cover your ears?) while there is a line of people standing behind them waiting for them to finish the transaction.
“HELLO person….come back to Earth and get a move on”.
Anyway, the transaction was finally completed after the cashier called someone over to help.
Then, there was just the one lady in front of me. I was thinking she had a lot more than 10 items.
She started unloading her basket……28, 29, 30, 31, 32. She had 32 items!
Do you think she couldn’t count, because surely she wouldn’t just think she was better than everyone else by completely ignoring the sign, right?
Awwww….33 items, she picked up…uh, 34 items, she picked up another item at the counter. Somebody stop her, is she just trying to aggravate the others in line with me now? Ok, she stopped at 34.
I should have said something to her, but at that point, what would that have accomplished? She would not have said, “Oh, I am terribly sorry I did not see the sign, let me load these back into my basket and go elsewhere”.
I do have a few friends that would have said something and probably quite loudly, but they were not with me.
What makes people do things like that? Why do people think they should be able to get away with stuff like that?
Well, I guess partly is that no one says anything to them. I didn’t, but then again, the store personnel did not enforce “their rule” by saying anything.
Some people, just flat out, feel the rules don't apply to them!
I have said this before, that I avoid conflict in almost anyway possible. I most likely will not say anything about a situation unless it is hurtful in some way to the ones I love (family or friends), then I am like a mother bear protecting her cubs. My “cub” is taken by surprise when this occurs, as they feel it is out of character for me (as was for my boyfriend referenced in my post “In just one unsuspecting moment!”).
Back to the store….
Not only did she have more items than she was supposed to, she decided to start looking for her checkbook after the cashier finished bagging and totalling. Gosh, why couldn't she have had her checkbook in hand and ready to fill in the total? She had plenty of time (the entire time the cashier was scanning and bagging all 34 of her items) to have the check made out. If she was not in that much of a hurry, why did she go through the express lane anyway? I didn't find that very courteous.
15 minutes after I entered the checkout line, my 8 items were zipped through the scanner, bagged and I was on my way out of the door.
Some people are just rude and have no discretion.
There should be a cell phone etiquette class required for all cell phone users.
Now before anything else is said…I have a cell phone, in fact only a cell phone. I have not had a land line for the last 5 years. However, I do feel there is a time and place for everything and the checkout line is not the place, nor the time to be chatting on the phone.
And….no breaking the express lane rules!
Ok, ....I feel better now, and as Mojo says….”nuff said”!
:)

35 comments:

Rob Seifert said...

Me thinks it is disrespectful in that it's grossly inconsiderate and frankly obnoxious to march into the express lane with 34 items AND THEN WRITE A FREAKING CHECK! Ugh! The most I would have said would be, "Thank you for enriching my grocery shopping experience!" I'd have said it with the most cheerful smile which you'd almost beleive unless you looked into my eyes - but I doubt I could have stayed silent.

Cell Phones... I didn't have one for years because I disliked being on a leash and the general rudeness of cell phone users. I was in customer service at the time and people were forever standing at the counter on the phones ignoring me. It got so bad that I'd start helping the people behind them first while they finished their phone call. This angered more than a few. I would smile and politely reply looking directly into their eyes, "Oh, I'm sorry, you were obviously busy and I didn't want to distract you. Are you ready now? GREAT!" - Captian Oblivious to the rescue! I have a cell again which almost never use and I NEVER use it in public unless I have to.

RCS

The Zombie Lama said...

I HATE when people talk on the phone in a check out line. You know what I do if my cell phone rings and I'm in a check out line? I LET IT RING! That's why I have voicemail! ARGH. I hate it when people are yapping on the phone and the cashier is trying to be polite, or hand them money or whatever, and these people don't even have the common courtesy to stop their oh so important conversation to be a decent human being for 5 minutes!

Grrr.... That's it! I'm eating some brains....

jiggs said...

You should have gone outside and keyed her car. Or a beating would have been good. Many problems can be solved by either keying somebody's car or beating them up.

robmcj said...

It's passive aggression. These people need therapy, but in the meantime they're going to ensure they make others suffer. Just imagine the cheer that would go up if the checkout person told them to put half the stuff back or join a regular queue.

Or if everyone in the queue started counting out loud in unison.

Re the phone thing. One time on the bus, I had the courage to take out my own phone and start a fake conversation with it. As the person spoke louder to drown me out, I got louder too. I'm not very good at making up stuff on the spur of the moment, so I recited some chemical formulae and computer jargon, then some stuff I remembered from school Geography. I don't know what I achieved, but I felt better. I was hoping they might break off their conversation and ask me to be quiet, giving me the chance to say "excuse me, I'm on the phone"

Edge said...

Ya, it's shouldn't be by item. It should be by weight. If you have stuff that's under 5 pounds or 1 heavy item ( like dog food ) you can go through.

We should all have the right to verbally harrass sad idiots in line. We're too polite in the South. Or should I say passive aggressive, "Oh, no go right ahead it's no big deal you have 34 in the 10 lane and I only have 2 things."

I need a yellow flag or something to throw. "That's 34 items in the 10 item lane, delay of game, that will cost you $15 and loss of place in line. FIRST DOWWWWWWWWWN!"

Lee Ann said...

RCS ~ Inconsiderate, yes you are right. I will have to remember that line "Thank you for enriching my grocery shopping experience!" I like that. Regarding the cell phones...I don't blame you for going to the next person and helping them. If they are busy on their phone, then they must not be ready for your service. When I used to work part time in a bookstore, if someone was on their cell phone at check out (not paying attention to me), I would simply ring them up and interrupt their conversation telling them their total. I would skip the part asking if they had a discount card. Sometimes, after the fact, they would say "oh, I have a discount card, did you take off my 10%?" I said "no, you were busy, so I didn't interrupt you. Ok, let me unbag your items,void the sale and re-ring you." (with a BIG smile on my face) Then they felt the pressure on them from the line of people they were holding up and inevitably would apologize.

Zombie ~ EXACTLY...that is what voice mail is for, right? People hear the ring and it is like they are programmed to pick it up(kind of like zombies...ahhahaha)Sorry, I couldn't resist with that one. But you are absolutely dead on with your comments! Ok, go back to eating the brains.

Jiggs ~ hahaha you make me laugh. I just couldn't picture myself in a fist fight! I would have to call on your help there.

Robmcj ~ I know the "Express Lane" rules are broken all the time. It would be great to see a manager stand up to the customer and tell them they were not allowed in that lane. We all know, unless the manager had great diplomacy, he would probably lose that customer for the embarrassment they endure, even though they brought it on themself...but that would be great to see. I like the idea of everyone counting in unison. That is great! I love what you did with your cell phone. The other day, I was driving, came to an intersection. I waited my turn and started through the intersection to make a left turn. The woman at the left side of the intersection started up before I was halfway through my turn.
I reacted by slowing down to almost a crawl speed. As I was passing the front of her car, she had to come to a complete stop. I noticed she was talking on her cell phone (so I gestured with my left hand as if I was talking on my phone and shook my head) You should have seen the look she gave me...one, for making her stop in the middle of the intersection and two, making her realize she was driving foolish,and shouldn't be gabbing on her cell phone.

hotboy said...

I'd be far too scared to be rude to anyone in America. When that happens in films someone always goes for their guns. Do you have a gun, by the way. And if so, have you ever fired it? Hotboy

Lee Ann said...

Jef ~ Hey, you slipped in while I was responding to the other guys. ahahaha, I like that flag idea! I am probably too passive in certain situations. You are right, most of us are brought up to be polite and courteous. I think I am taken by complete surprise when someone says something like "Can I go in front of you? I am in such a hurry". That is like saying, my life is more important than yours, so let me go first. Have you ever been in that situation before? Now there have been times when I have more items in a line and I see someone behind me has very few, and I offer them to go in front of me. I still like your flag idea, a lot.

Lee Ann said...

Hotboy ~ I have seen incidents of shootings on the news, but I have never personally seen it. No, I do not have a gun, but my boyfriend thinks I should have one for protection because I live alone. I have fired my boyfriend's gun at the shooting range. I am not very good at it, but he is.

mojoala said...

I am going to have to blog this myself as well because I hate to leave a comment that is more like a blog in itself....

Bill said...

The same happens in the security line at the airport. Is there anyone in the world that has not figured out that you cannot take a pocket knife onto a plane??? Or that their belt has metal in it? Maybe even that coins will set off the metal detector? The only consolation for the checkout people and the morons at the airport is that lack of stupid people would eliminate my job!

mojoala said...

it's been blogged Lee Ann.

Becky said...

I used to work in a grocery store, and if i was ringing up people in the express lane, it was against store policy to tell them they had too many items...
I would never do that kind of thing though, I always check my cart to see if I have too many. I don't always count but if i don't have an excessive amount I'll use the express lane. I don't understand why people write checks at all anymore! You have debit cards now!

The Husband said...

man, that type of situation drives me crazy...CRAZY! first, her talking on the phone while in line is insane. i can not stand that. very rude. then, her abusing the express lane is horrible. i see more and more people doing that. i'm waiting for the casheir to have some balls and say something. finally, using her checkbook...its called DEBIT CARDS people. i would have been so fucking pissed if i was behind that lady. i'm angry just thinking about it. ok...inhale, exhale. deep breaths...

Lee Ann said...

Bill ~ Yes, you are right. People are always trying to get away with things. Things would go a lot smoother if they just "went by the rules".

Mojo ~ I will take a look!

Becky ~ I am like you, I count my items and do the right thing. That is what I thought, "who writes checks anymore"?

Carl ~ I know what you mean....ok breathe! The check thing, really! I knew some people that would write checks to float their money a few days. Now, so many places have electronic transactions with checks, that it is debited from your account immediately, just like a debit card. Its funny to watch the reaction on some people's face when they are handed their check back and told that it was electronically debited.

Frank The Tank said...

Wow, sounds like a great experience! I personally, would have said something... that's just how I am... I FUCKING HATE that! I will count my items, and if I am one over, I will NOT go to the express lane! Also, CHECK BOOK IN THE EXPRESS AISLE! WTF?

As for the cell phone thing, I have to admit that I am guilty of that, however, I NEVER EVER talk loudly when people are around, and generally, will ask if I can call right back or tell the other person to hold on! I am ver self consious of people knowing my business! I don't want strangers knowing ANYTHING about my life! Oh yeah, and I agree, it is rude and fucking annoying! I live in L.A., the city of assholes and their cell phones! sometimes I want to take peoples phones and shove them right up their asses!

Edge said...

It's always polite to let someone go ahead of you with only a couple of items. It's never polite to ask to go ahead of them.

"Incosiderate shopping on the offensive by asking to place your piddly life in front of mine. $5 Loss of place in line. Repeat 1st DOWWWWWWNNNNNNNNN!"

Lee Ann said...

Frank ~ I am like you I count my items, and head for a different lane if I am over. I like to keep my phone calls personal as well. The nerve of some people blasting out their conversation then look at you like you shouldn't be listening! haha

Jef ~ Good call on that one!

Fred said...

Let me guess. You then went out to the parking lot, and one car was taking up two spaces. That would have been the icing.

Bobby said...

people also need to learn just because the cell phone is on you, doesn't mean you ALWAYS have to answer it, there is an invention called voicemail.

And I worked somewhere once that actually let you tell customers that they had to go to a different line other than Express, as long as you caught them before they unloaded. It was one of my more pleasurable job duties, implying these people couldn't count.

Lee Ann said...

Fred ~ That would have been the icing on the cake. I cannot stand it when people can't park their vehicle properly! You seem to find that more with the Huge SUVs and the little soccer mom driving them!

Bobby ~ Hi! Thanks for stopping by. Yes, voicemail, was a really good invention! One thing I don't like is call waiting. I can't stand for someone to put me on hold while someone is beeping through. Half the time they forget to come back to you. My cell phone has it, but I don't use it. I wait until my call is finished and call the other person back (from the voicemail they leave) :)

hotboy said...

Lee Ann: I heard a luger firing at the BBC in London once. A special effect. The record didn't sound right. The gun was in a case. They took it out like a sacrament and fired it a couple of times. (It was to shoot the Presidential candidate in the radio version of The ReaL McCoy) Anyway, I couldn't believe how loud it was. Then someone who knew about guns told me that blanks sounded different. Louder. I've never heard a gun firing. Are they ear burstingly loud? If they are, don't you think they should sound like that in films? Like, ouch!Hotboy

Lee Ann said...

Hotboy ~ I am not an expert in guns at all. I have been to the shooting range a few times. It is very loud. I had either earplugs or earphones to wear. When I was on the swim team growing up, they would always start the race with a gunshot (blanks), and I can tell you that was very loud as well. I did learn one thing, that when I fired a rifle, it made my contacts hazy. I had to throw the contacts away.
The thought of going to a western or action film where they hand out earplugs for the gun scenes! haha

BeckEye said...

My favorite phrase for such people, "it's yourworld". That's how they act. No one else matters but them. It's amazing we all haven't killed each other by now.

jiggs said...

Don't sell yourself short. I bet you'd be able to hold your own in fisticuffs. Just remember to say things like "BAM!", "BIFF!" and "KAPOW!" as you're punching.

Lee Ann said...

BeckEye ~ That is perfect, I will have to remember that.

Jiggs ~ Ah, a little fisticuffs, eh? ;) Thanks for the tips, I will remember that. Still may need your help though!

Dave Morris said...

You've hit on several of my pet peeves in this post. I won't even take bananas through the express lane for fear someone behind me might think they should count for 5 separate items. What further bugs me is the self-check outs. Theoretically it should be better, since many times the checkout person operates with ZERO urgency, but the scanners and the bag weight thingy are too prone to errors.

Let's face it... if you're in the checkout lane, you can't win.

Lee Ann said...

Dave ~ I know. Do they count the rolls in a bag separately? What about a six pack? That is funny. Yeah, I have done the self check out before. More times than not, it does have errors. My errors are usually the weight of the item not matching the description. What malarkey!

Me said...

*"There should be a cell phone etiquette class required for all cell phone users."

I agree with you ....

I was once in a grocery store and the guy behind me was talking on his cell phone to (hopefully) his wife and describing the prostate exam he just came from! He wasn't even trying to speak softly, in fact, he was speaking rather loudly due to the ambient noise. Well, I turned to him and said, "If you don't mind...I really DON'T want to hear how your doctor had his finger up your A** 10 minutes ago!" Surprised at my outburst, he promptly turned red and left the place. Hey if cell phoners are going to talk about their most intimate details of their life in a public area, don't be surprised if the person next to you gets upset or makes a comment....If you want it private...keep it private...as long as it's not on the road next me either.

Lee Ann said...

Avik ~ Yes, way to go! I don't blame you for saying that, and he should have been embarrassed. I also agree with cell phones while driving; seems that people forget how to drive when they talk on their cell phone. It's almost as bad as when it rains, people forget how to drive.

Kay Ray said...

The same can be said for a few other things like.. DRIVING IN THE FAST LANE GOING 10 MILES UNDER THE SPEED LIMIT. or working in close quarters in an office filled with millions of cubicals AND TALKING ON SPEAKER PHONE another more personal disrespect is when the SAME family memebers are late for EVERYTHING and you have to wait on them to eat at holidays... Great post today, i went to my co-workers today and discussed it they were fired up!!

ticharu said...

I bet if you gave cashiers handguns and they just shot anyone with more than 10 items, it wouldn't take long to solve the problem! Same with cell phone! That would be great, yer cell phones rings and everyone hits the deck! Hahahaha!

Justice said...

I blame the stores for allowing people to be checked out in the express lanes when they have excessive items. I understand if you have 11 or 12 items in a lane that is supposed to be 10 or less, but if you go above that, the store should make you go get in another line.

Lee Ann said...

Kay Ray ~ All of those examples are definitely disrespectful. Like BeckEye says, a phrase we should use is"it's yourworld". That is the way so many people think...their world and no one else's. Have a good day!

Ticharu ~ hahaha...hit the deck!uh,oh...what? they are heading for the express lane with too many items....hit the deck! You are too funny!

Justice ~ I am in total agreement with you. It is ultimately up to the store to enforce their "rules". There are always going to be those "pushy" people that try to get away with things. There would be less of that if the rules were enforced to begin with.

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