Friday, March 10, 2006

What'd they say?

JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold?"

MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six."

STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much, that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."

BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a childproof cap and she'd have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?

SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please don't give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."

DJ (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I cost?"

MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: "Why is he whispering in her mouth?"

CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"

JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"

TAMMY (age4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, a rather wrinkled woman that her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for awhile and then asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"

The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget.... this particular Sunday sermon..."Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. "Without you, we are but dust." He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening!) leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?"

Have a great weekend!
~Hugs to all


Ellen said...

Kids say the darndest things, don't they? LOL!

Remember when you were first learning the ABC's... and there was that part that went: ella-meno-p?

When my son was first learning to talk he used to say "purkle" instead of purple, and "pa-sketty" instead of spaghetti. How cute!
Of course now his vocabulary astounds me!

Hope you have a great weekend. It's supposed to be nice according to one weather report... not so nice according to another. Hmmmm... I pick: NICE! I'm sure the bride at the wedding we are doing, is on my side on that.

DaMasta said...

Duh. Butt dust appears when you don't use yer butt for a while.

I've been going to the gym, so I don't have butt dust.


Saur♥Kraut said...

Oh I love this post. When SaurKid was about 5 I got a similar list in my email and was chuckling over it. One that really set me off was a kid saying "Solomon had 300 wives and 600 porcupines."

SaurKid asked why it was so funny. "He meant concubines, dear," I said. "A concubine is a type of a wife."

"Solomon had 900 wives???" SaurKid asked incredulously. I nodded.

"I thought he was supposed to be wise!" said SaurKid, amazed.

Outta the mouth of babes...

Lee Ann said...

Ellen ~ That is adorable. I have heard the little ones say pa-sketty. Well, spaghetti is a tough one,isn't it? :) Those are great memories aren't they!
You have a great weekend too.

Damasta ~ Haha...I hope I don't get the Butt dust! I am working on not getting it! ;)

Saur ~ That is adorable! Saurkid sounds very intelligent for a 5 year old. He could add 300 and 600. You are right...outta the mouths of babes!

Phil said...

Damn kids.

We should make one of our own.

Mike said...

Gotta love what kids will come up with.

AndyW said...

The "butt dust" line has me laughing out loud here at work.

Anonymous said...

Lee Ann... Thank You! You have really made my day! Kids DO say the darndest things, no?

Butt dust... HAHAhahahaha...

Becky said...

Gotta love the innocence in a child's question!

Wuv you Lee Ann! Hope you have a good weekend!

WDKY said...

They're so good it's hard to pick out a favourite. Maybe no. 2, though...

angel, jr. said...

I have a book full of sayings like that. It's called "The Peanut Butter Gang". Great reading.

hotboy said...

Stopping in the Gulf on the way to Australia, my daughter (not quite three) pointed to this very elegantly dressed arab guy and said: Why's that man wearing a tea towel on his head? Hotboy
p.s. Found later that the headgear (red and white wee squares)was made in Paisley by the same firm who made tea towels. The tea towels are wee-er, that's all. Still, if the ground could swallow you up!

angel, jr. said...

Going to the gym today to use the stair stepper thing and maybe start some weights.

Lee Ann said...

Phil ~ Oh, my! You are a cute one aren't you! *Big hug*

Mike ~ The best laughs come from the most innocent words don't they?

Andy ~ I know, that one is good.

Nilo ~ We all need a laugh...good for the soul ;)

Becky ~ Luv you too Becky, have a great weekend.

wdky ~ I know, I cannot decide which is my favorite either! Have a great weekend.

Angel ~ Oh, I bet that is good reading! A feel good book :)

Hotboy ~ Oh, isn't that a great memory? I love that.

Angel ~ Oh that is great! Keep it up! I talked to my trainer today, he said cardio and stretching for me today. He postponed our next session until Monday. I am so is hard to walk, sit, stand (basically move). So I will do cardio and stretch all weekend. :)

Heather said...

Those were just adorable.

Hope you have a great weekend.

Kay Ray said...

Hey girl!! Sorry I haven't been blogging latley.. I've become ADDICTED to myspace!! U NEED TO GET ONE!!! I miss you too!!

cmhl said...

butt dust! hahahaha. those are great!!

Captain Carl said...

Carl (age 57) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After a while he asked: "Mom why am I a 10inch plastic man?"

Arrr......that is a great post!!......

BuccoTom said...

ROFLMAO, Lee Ann, you never fail to put a smile on my face. Love ya doll.

jiggs said...

butt dust!

I'm going to incorporate that into my daily lexicon.

ticharu said...

Mine are teenagers and they still say the darndest things.

Shannon said...

Lmaoooo @ Little Jake.. how cute was that?!? Have a great weekend Lee Ann!! =)

Shannon said...

Jack* Even lol

Justin Kreutzmann said...

that's great!

robmcj said...

Ha ha! Thanks for that lee Ann. Have a good break.

Andre said...

That's some funny shit. I have a hard time believing they are all real though.

Your blog is great by the way. I added you to the HNT list on mine.

DaMasta said...

Are you sure that wasn't BILL Clinton when he was 5yrs old??


Menzies Milngavie III said...

My dear Lee Ann!

What wonderful stories. Aren't children delightful?

I remember that on Menzies IV's first safari, he assessed the tented accommodation, looked rather puzzled, and then complained: "But father, there are no PLUGS!"


jiggs said...

I'm back to enjoy your booty.

Gyrobo said...

Your blog is all reminding me of a patchwork quilt for some reason.

truckdriver_sefl said...

Great post here Lee Ann I love to listen to children they are soooooo honest!

Lee Ann said...

Heather ~ I hope you have a wonderful weekend too!

Kay Ray ~ Hey girl, I have missed you. Lots of love...have a great weekend.

cmhl ~ Hey! So nice of you to stop by. I think the butt dust was the big hit ;) Hope you come by more often.

Captain ~ Oh, Captain my never cease to amuse me ;)

TG ~ Love you too TG!

Jiggs ~ butt dust...I will expect to see it from now on *giggle* I will reply with booty dust!!

Tich ~ Well, that goes to show you we never really grow up, right!

Shannon ~ Thank you Shannon, you too!

Justin ~ Have a great weekend!

Rob ~ Thanks Rob, you too!

Andre ~ Oh, a fellow Deadhead! Thank you. Glad you stopped over, I hope to see you over here more often.

Damasta ~ Haha, very definitely could be.

MMIII ~ Oh, that is wonderful. He is precious.

Jiggs ~ Thank you Jiggsy *blushing*

Gyro ~ Yeah, it is a little colorful lately, isn't it?

Trucker ~ You are so right, thank you.

BeckEye said...

I love kids. My nieces crack me up on a regular basis. My nephews are cool too, but one of them is too little to talk and the other one just repeats everything he hears off of Spongebob.

Fred said...

I'll never forget when my middle daughter said, "Dad, you've obviously forgotten what it's like to be a child."

What could I say to that?

Lee Ann said...

Beckeye ~ Little kids are so cool. We went to a friend's new house they just moved into the other night. They had no cable connection, but it wasn't necessary, their little girl was so entertaining to watch!

Fred ~ Haha, that is the classic "kid line". I remember using that one on my parents. :)

Neo said...

Lee Ann - AH! That was cute! LOL

Peace & Hugs,

- Neo

Lee Ann said...

Neo ~ you are the sweetest!